Thursday, December 30, 2010

My opinions, such as they are

I've noticed the comments dropping off on my blog a bit, which I feel I can probably attribute to the holiday season and people generally having more exciting things to do than read this blog. Eating large amounts of food, for example. Or performing in Nativity pageants. Nevertheless, I can't help but wonder if it's not also a product of what I'm putting out there. After all, what is there really to comment on about snow? Perhaps my many readers are actually still out there reading, but just aren't getting enough to work with. (For the record, I truly appreciate all of you who've told me you read and just aren't big commenters. I don't need comments to feel I have a successful blog, I'm just trying to keep things interesting.)

Anyway, in light of this revelation, I'm devoting this post to shaking things up a bit with some controversial views on hot button topics. Actually, scratch that; I don't really want to tackle hot button topics at all. I will, however, try to take positions that I find controversial in that they go against conventional opinion. Such as: hating puppies, although I do not, in fact, hate puppies. I've already mentioned my distaste for mashed potatoes which I've found people consider as going against all that is tasty and good in the world. I've also mentioned my stubborn antipathy for James Franco, although I'm hoping this film's release will help cure people of their "James Franco can do no wrong" type sentiments. Today, I have two more for you:

1) Automatic windows in cars
I can only assume everybody likes these because I don't think they even put the manual window roll-up devices on cars anymore. But I can't help but wonder if they have been ubiquitously embraced without questioning the consequences. Now, I'm as lazy as the next person, and I too can appreciate the arm muscle saved (I mean, come on, if I wanted to use muscles willy nilly like that, I could have just walked wherever I was going and skipped the car all together, am I right?). No, my issue is not with the laziness factor; it's with the fact that you have to have the car on to operate the windows. How many times have you been waiting in a car while the driver ran in to get something and thought how stuffy it was with the windows up? Without the keys, your only option is to open the door. Okay, so that one has an easy fix. But what if you're trying to roll the windows up quickly because a serial killer/rabid dog/swarm of locusts is lunging for the open window--and the keys have fallen somewhere under the seat. I think it's important to prepare your life as if it could become a horror movie at any moment.

Luckily this woman either had her keys or had the archaic manual windows. Otherwise, she would be getting rained on, thanks to modern technology.

Granted, I don't own a car, but this oversight might just be on my list (albeit not particularly high on the list) of reasons not to acquire one.

2) Bananas and bacon on pizza
Now this is something I like, that I can't figure out why it hasn't caught on with other people. When I suggest the combination (outside of South Africa where I was introduced to it), I'm met with a mix of surprise and pity. Bananas are excellent with salty things--peanut butter and banana sandwiches come to mind. Likewise fruit is good on pizza, or at the very least, people have become used to seeing pineapple on it without recoiling. Bananas hold their shape surprisingly well on a pizza, and, as anyone who's ever had a banana fritter knows, they are excellent warmed up. I could understand it not becoming a staple at Pizza Hut or anything, but I've seen far weirder things on pizzas (even at chain places). Lettuce? Carrots? Celery? Surely, these things have no more business on pizza than bananas do, and yet they're all available on signature California Pizza kitchen pizzas. A travesty.

Okay, I'll admit this doesn't look super appetizing, but there are so few pictures of banana and bacon pizzas to choose from. The fact that the internet doesn't even seem familiar with this makes me feel that much more alone in my opinions.

Not terribly controversial, but there you have it. I hope everyone has a happy end of 2010!


  1. I'll bet James Franco is starting up a pizza place right now with bacon and bananas as a featured item. Did you notice he got 2 mentions in the NYT 110 things people talked about in 2010 (12/30/10)? Seriously, those banana slices are huge! Are you sure they are not(unsweet)plaintains?

    I want to challenge other commenters to step up also, as it appears that I have nothing to do but read and comment on your blog.

  2. I did notice! The man is everywhere.

    Also, you are most certainly my most loyal commenter! I always enjoy your comments.

  3. So in response to your first topic, our truck (a 2008) actually was sold with manual windows. And manual doors. We got the bare-bones model. :)

    I have often thought how awesome it is because I sometimes get claustrophoic in cars, and the knowledge that when the car is on OR off, I can open a window and escape whatever terror is inside the vehicle.

    I have a feeling more people read your blog than you think. That's usually the case. Keep writing!

    p.s. Banana on pizzas? Sounds gross. :p

  4. Rachel--I stand corrected! And to think, I was just riding in your truck the other day and failed to notice this. Consider this a mark of friendship that I so enjoy your company, I wasn't even noting my escape route.

  5. Lol! I love that you think of escape routes! But I have to go with a big no with Bananas on Pizza! That just sounds gross! :) But then I am not a big banana fan anyways!

  6. Ummm, sorry to tell you, but that movie looks AWESOME! I mean, Natalie Portman is really hot, and it's been a while since they've done a medieval spoof movie, personally I would say much too long. Did you even see Pineapple Express? Give JF a chance!

  7. Ok, I'm not a big commenter (but I do read your blog) unless you happen to be writing about me....ahem. I just have to say that my Mother would appreciate your manual windows comment as I know she is concerned that if the car should ever tumble into a body of water she will be unable to roll down the windows and get out. Makes sense to me too. The banana/bacon're gonna have to work harder to sell me on that one.

  8. Comments are really slow across the blogosphere at the moment, so I wouldn't take it personally - I expect it'll pick up in a few days.

    I'm with you on the windows (as a non-driver, it scares me when I have to switch the engine on to get my window open!) but I don't like bananas in any form...